Normally whenever a non-IF friend announces a pregnancy or I find out about a pregnancy I admit, I get jealous. Yesterday, for the first time in a long time I wasn’t jealous. I was 100% happy for her. She didn’t tell me. A couple of mutual friends figured it out and I walked in on them as they were squealing after figuring it out. Of course the newly preg friend had hidden it from all of us (she’s known since NYE) because she knows about my IF struggle. In fact, she has hugged me while I cried, asked appropriate questions and has learned more than she’s ever wanted to know about the whole reproduction process. She has been awesome. Her husband is awesome. I am so freaking happy for them!
I don’t know what the difference is, exactly, as to why the green monster didn’t come out for this preg announcement. Maybe it’s because of my decision to change my mindset during this cycle (still have only had the one panic attack when I found out we might have to pay for injectibles). Maybe it’s because of the meditation download that I’ve been listening to from Circle+Bloom. Maybe it’s from using EFT. Maybe it’s a combination of all of that. Truth is, I don’t really care why, I’m just glad that the green monster is staying away from me right now.