How do people do this???

I feel like my heart is going to beat right out of my chest. What if she changes her mind? I have been looking at baby stuff and even started a baby registry on Walmart’s website. What if it’s all for nothing? How do adoptive parents do this, waiting for the birth mother to give birth and then sign papers? Seriously, I only slept 6 hours last night and I cannot keep food in my stomach.

I have been researching all morning (thank you, Becca for letting me borrow the laptop) and I have figured out that LA doesn’t do the guardianship thing but that we can file for relative adoption here. Literally all R has to do is sign a consent for us to adopt and then we do the rest. There is no home evaluation (b/c we are family) but there is a waiting period for finalization and background checks. Of course, R has to agree to all of this which I really pray will happen. In order to give S everything she needs and deserves we really need to adopt her. We want an open adoption with R and we of course would not cut off contact with her.

I need to relax and not stress but I can’t help it. My house is a mess and it must be cleaned today. The dogs must be played with and I need to shower. Seriously wish my husband was home with me to help with all of this….


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