Christmas spirit, I need it

Today was a bad day but it’s now better. For once, I don’t want to spill my guts about the details. In general it was because P and I are both stressed about moving, finding a home, deployment and infertility. We were supposed to get a tree and decorate it today but instead we have been laying around all day, recuperating from our day trip to the Natchitoches Christmas Festival yesterday. We walked so much yesterday that I count it as a workout. The parade was good, the lights were fantastic and the fireworks were great πŸ™‚ Oh and time with our friends was awesome. Good food, good times and great cold weather.

I spent a lot of time with our friend F’s niece. Her daddy is a college student and let me say, him and his girlfriend were absolutely awesome. They opened their home to us, fed us some great food and made us feel welcome. They are also incredible parents. The niece, B is incredibly cute and by the afternoon had completely warmed up to me-playing peek-a-boo and wanting me to hold her. Can we say baby pangs? I loved holding her and playing with her. She is the cutest little tot and was dressed in a Santa dress and hat. Too freaking cute.

Today I actually thought of giving up on ever conceiving. I don’t know why but the thought crossed my mind about just stopping trying to conceive and just moving on to adopting. I re-thought it, which is why I want the word ‘hope’ tattooed on the inside of my right wrist. P is *this close* to okaying it and another friend shared a great tattoo script with me. I am psyched to get it.

Ok, I am rambling. I’m off to chat with my TTC gals. Oh yeah, my fab DH let me order Uggs for Xmas and I should be getting them in about 5 business days. Can. NOT. Wait.



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3 responses to “Christmas spirit, I need it

  1. PCOSChick

    I had the same moment last week-mine with giving up on it all & just getting another dog & calling it a good day…so I feel your pain. Sadly, this is all something we go through & it’s not fair! You will be a mom one day & an amazing one! I can only hope all our children know how VERY much they were wanted & loved before we even had them. Chin up hun! We are all here for you!!

  2. Jen

    Oh I miss the great lights festival! I’m glad you had a good time.

    I think military families forget how incredibly stressful moving can be simply because it’s something we have to deal with consistently in our lives. Between TTC, deployments, and moving….it’s a huge amount of stress. It’s stress that you deal with on a day to day basis, it’s bound to make you crack sometime. My dad pointed out to me that three moves is the equivalent of the stress of a divorce! Seriously. So in perspective, you are doing a fabulous job handling all of this. πŸ™‚ {hugs}

    I can not wait to see pictures of your soon-to-be tattoo!

  3. hey! tattoo sounds awesome…hope is something people always need!!!! wanna sse some uggs pics too πŸ™‚

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