I haven’t gone a day without crying.
I haven’t gone a day without praying that it wasn’t true.
Some days I am hopeful and hopeless at different times on the same days.
Everyday I am terrified that FET will not work.
Everyday I thank God for my family, friends and especially my amazing husband who makes me feel supported all the way from Afghanistan.
I have a plan because, well….plans make me feel better and more in control. I have become a BeachBody coach and plan to work through P90X (for a second time, love it!) and then Insanity so that I can get in shape and lose the IUI/IVF weight that I’ve gained over the past 2 years. I really want to make my BeachBody business work so that we can become debt free and so that we can save up money for future infertility treatments. My goal this week is to get through all the BB training so that I can really get started in this. For me, it’s not just about making money; it’s also about helping people improve their lives and get healthy. Here are my sites (so far) http://beachbodycoach.com/esuite/home/liberalgranola (My BeachBody page) and http://myshakeology.com/esuite/home/liberalgranola (my Shakeology page). I drink the chocolate Shakeology everyday and I freaking love it! Look for more posts on here about me getting in shape and helping others 🙂
My health/fitness goal is to lose 2 dress sizes, which will get me back to where I was before starting injectable infertility medications. It is a totally do-able goal for me. Also I’ll be smokin’ hot for P when he returns from deployment 🙂
I realize that there is no way that I can do FET without P here. Doing this fresh IVF cycle without him here, while being solely responsible for the kiddos was way too stressful. I have my WTF appt with the RE next month and I plan to talk to him about FET in detail, including letting him know my reasons for waiting. This failed IVF cycle has just been so emotionally and physically draining….I now know that I need P here with me for support.
I could not have gotten through this without the amazing support from my friends online. Seriously, y’all are a lifeline to me. Yo have people who understand, support me and don’t judge me is so wonderful. I love y’all.
I will be PUPO! I cannot believe it. My best work friend is keeping the babes tomorrow and I have arranged play/diaper/sleeping areas in the TV room for my couch rest time. Tomorrow morning I will make baked oatmeal and poppy seed chicken casserole so that I don’t have to stand on my feet on actually cook 🙂 Movies have been rented through RedBox and we also have plenty available On Demand (free) and in our DVD collection. The house is clean and most of the laundry is done….so I think that I am ready for tomorrow.
Now I am praying that this works and we have a new baby or two in the fall 🙂
THanks again to Wife of a Sailor for starting this!
1. What characteristic about yourself has either been strengthened or weakened due to your experience as a Military Spouse?
My independence and ability to take care of everything has been stregthened. I love and adore my husband, but I have learned to do all the daily stuff on my own, while still working full time, while he’s deployed.
2. What is your favorite vacation spot and why?
Hmmmm, i really don’t know. We used to live in Savannah so to me it felt like we were almost living in a vacation for 2 years. I would love to go back there for an extended vacation 🙂
3. If you could have any fast-food restaurant in the food court on base/post what would you pick?
I don’t even know what’s available in the food court here, lol! Right now my fast food favorite, in general, is Five Guys Burgers and Fries. My mouth is watering just thinking about the bacon cheeseburger there….
4. Where did you go on your honeymoon?
We didn’t have a honeymoon. We got married on the beach at Tybee Island and then PCS’d just a few days later. After this deployment we want to visit D.C. and then in a few years we want to take an anniversary trip to Ireland.
5. If you could have any job in the world regardless of money, degree or experience, which job would you have and why?
Hmmmm, probably a photojournalist. I love photography and I would like to travel to places like Sudan, Haiti, etc to take pictures to not only show the hardships of the area but to show the beauty of the people there.
I LOVE this but have been unable to participate much due to computer issues and work keeping me busy. Thankfully today is a slow day (so far) at work so I’m back 🙂
Thanks again to
P has left for a year-ish. He will be overseas fighting in this MF’ing war. I am so proud of him and what he does for a living but this will damn sure be the most difficult year of my life so far. I love that man and cannot wait to kiss him again. He’s texted and called all day to check on me. He’s going to war yet he’s checking on ME who is sitting at home in my comfy house. *sigh* The bestest man, for real.
Through my Twitter, FB, Army wife message board, deployment blog (if you want that link, email me at TTC_Queen@yahoo.com) and cell phone, I have felt tremendous love and support today. Not that I haven’t felt the support before, I have, but today it was amazing. When I was blubbering in the wee hours hours of the morning, my Twitter friends (from across the world) wrapped their virtual arms around me in love. My all time BFF texted with me from Chicago until she could no longer stay awake. I got loving text messages from Twitter friends and local Army wife friends, all letting me know that I was loved and that I can do this. My BFF here more than forgave me for skipping out on Zumba (I didn’t fall asleep until after sunrise) and her cooking me breakfast. My FB friends have left the most amazing supportive messages and wall postings. My Army wife message board friends have been amazing. I’ve gotten emails and texts from my family all day.
The only way that I am coping as well as I am is because of my family and friends and their love. I’ve managed to shower, go to WalMart, eat and clean some of the house today. I haven’t spent the entire day in tears. I’ve thought about all the goals I can achieve while he’s gone (not that I couldn’t achieve them with him here, but I need to focus on the positive). I’ve laughed. I’ve cried at the love I’ve received. I’ve been supremely touched that people that I’ve never met in real life care so much about me, about P and about all the troops that are deployed. As an Army wife it seriously makes me feel all warm and gooey inside.
Thank you Wife of a Sailor for coming up with this!
This week’s questions are:
1. How did you and your spouse/significant other meet?
I picked him up in a bar 🙂
2. What is the best thing about being a MilSpouse?
To me there are so many great things about being a MilSpouse. I love getting to move to different places and experience different parts of the country. Another perk to the moving is that I have met friends that I never would have met if I wasn’t a MilSpouse.
3. What is the hardest thing about being a MilSpouse?
I think the hardest thing is the lack of communication (especially for submarines) and the constant worry. But the good BY FAR outweigh the bad.
4. What is your favorite dish?
It depends on my mood. Overall I am a huge fan of Mexican food and could literally eat chips and salsa every single day. I also love fresh seafood and local fish. A good fish and chips rocks my world when served with a good beer and let’s not forget my love of buffalo wings.
5. If you could change one thing in this world, what would it be?
I wish that people would appreciate and protect the environment to a greater degree than what’s currently being done. Protectly the environment and finding alternative energy sources would help improve quality of life for all of Earth’s inhabitants.
Ok, now it’s your turn 🙂 If you’re a MilSpouse (that includes significant others) take part in this wonderful thing that Wife of a Sailor has started.
I want to blog but my thoughts are scattered so I thought I’d do a tidbit themed post 🙂
Green smoothies-I will be getting a GOOD blender soon (have to check the budget) so that I can start these. Someone asked me what these are so I’d like to explain as best as I can. A couple of months ago I found Boho Girl’s blog. She is a beautiful soul who’s TTC and adoption story inspired me. In one of her posts she talked about green smoothies and how she and Cedar (her and Boho Boy’s son) enjoy them daily. She provided a link to Happy Foody, a blog of Sara’s, another blogger that has inspired me. If any of my readers also drink green smoothies, I’d love to see your recipes 🙂
Our new home-It’s a rental house with a huge backyard and it was built in 1975. To call the electrical wiring a clusterfuck would be an understatement. (More on that in a later more detailed post). It’s got 3 bedrooms and one and a half baths. The dogs are immensely happy with the yard. The neighborhood is old and somewhat run down in parts but it is quiet and safe. We’ve talked about buying a home here in the Springs and settling down 🙂
Belonging-It is amazing to be in a big city after 2 years of living in a backwoods town. Once again I feel like I belong. I don’t feel like my leftist views and conservation views are weird here. People walk, ride bikes and use public transportation. I plan to start regularly going back to church again, probably to an Episcopal church. I plan to get serious about photography again and maybe even try to sell my work. My spirit is renewed here.
Sick-I’ve been sick and Ranger is now sick. for those who don’t know, I visited the Army hospital’s ER the first day that we moved into our home. Everyone there was wonderful! I am now recovering from a pretty severe UTI. I was actually crying (because of the pain) in the car on the way to the ER and I have NEVER cried because of an IUI. Ranger is now sick-a little blood in poop and vomiting. We think it’s the new food we bought them. Malibu and Bear won’t eat much of the food. Today we are going to PetsMart to get their regular food for them.
Nature-I am daily amazed at the beauty of the Rocky Mountains ❤
In laws-My FIL is coming to visit us for a week. He wants to help us get settled and help us do anything around the house that needs doing. He's also bringing P's snowboarding stuff so that P can snowboard this winter (if he's even here this winter).
The D word-Unless things change (like he gets send to another unit) P will be deploying before the winter. We are both not really thinking about it right now which is good. We will cross that bridge when we come to it. There are positives to deployment and I am determined to focus on those when the time comes.
Blogs-Today's goal is to catch up on the 300+ blogs in my Google Reader 🙂